Well I had good intentions about completing my yard clean-up yesterday, but it didn't happen. I had two huge piles by 10am, one at the end of the driveway for pick up, the other at the end of the house where I'd dragged it from the side yard. It was nasty, dirty work with old bottles full of water, beer cans that broke open spraying me with beer, wet leaves filling every conceivable space, and golf balls. There were golf balls everywhere.
I wanted to complete the task but with other things on my agenda that pile at the back of the house stayed there for the time being. My hope is that this afternoon I'll get out there to drag all those pieces over the the end of the driveway and then the job will pretty much be over. But I'm not sure it will be. That redwood table is a bear - heavy and awkward - and for some reason there's a pile of old rotted firewood that's going to be difficult to manage as it crumbles - and its wet....well, you get the picture.
Again, my life in illustration. I have all this debris to clean-out of my mind and I know it will be better when I'm done, but sometimes things have to be done in small chunks, as we are able to deal with them. I'm OK with that, although I'm anxious to finish, I know all in good time the task will be complete. And when it is, both my mental health, and my life, are going to be so much better for it. Thankfully I have God helping me with both, giving me the physical strength I need to pull those heavy objects around for disposal, and the mental ability to sort through the detritus and figure out exactly what needs to go and what should actually should stay. I'm getting there slowly but surely. And it feels really good.