Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Letting go

I know that life is a very long series of letting go. I've written about it before when children left, when I said goodbye to friends, so many times I've thought about how difficult it is to let go of the things - the people - you love. But never before has it been this hard.

I feel as though I can't breath sometimes and I suppose that's the "heartbreak" that they talk about, because we all know that hearts don't literally break. But there is that feeling that something is badly broken and nothing will ever be able to put it back together again. Scar tissue. Remember there is always scar tissue.

Someone told me to remember that God only gives us what we can deal with and that goes against my basic theology because I don't believe that God brings bad things into our lives. I believe that "only good and perfect things" come from God but that there is evil to contend with and that's where the bad things come from. The book "The Screwtape Letters" by C.S. Lewis deals with that and in fact it might be a good time for me to re-read that wonderful book right now. It seems timely for sure. I will go order it on Amazon as soon as I finish this blog today.

I don't make excuses for the things that people do that are harmful, but I do like to have reasons to help me process them. Reasons that I can get my head around and at the very least gives me some closure. I'm not sure we'll always have reasons in this world though. As another scripture says, here we "see through a glass darkly" and things may never be quite clear. But I look forward to the day I have answers. That is something to strive for, isn't it?

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