It's now less than two weeks before Christmas. I have to think that this year, from Thanksgiving to Christmas, went more quickly than most. I have no idea why, because according to the calendar we actually had more time this year than some. Regardless, I felt a little rushed.
This is a melancholy time for me, as it is for so many other people. We miss our loved ones when they are gone, and yet life goes on and we need to be "in the moment" as well as in the past. It's a delicate balance. But I really miss my Mom - this is only my second Christmas since she died.
Mom loved Christmas. If not for her we wouldn't have had very happy holidays at my house because my father, for whatever reason, was not a big fan of all the fuss. I like to think it had something to do with some unhappy memories he had of his own past Christmases - either from his difficult childhood or the years he spent in the freezing cold on the front lines during WWII. But my brother would no doubt say it was just because Dad was tight with his money and watching it being spent so freely on things like gifts and decorations was not his idea of fun.
Whatever the reason, his negative energy was counteracted by Mom's unabashed love of all things Christmas. She decorated the house with taste and entertained with abandon. She wrapped gifts and hid them in the attic for weeks ahead of time, all with no real participation from Dad. When I think of the things she accomplished every Christmas in the course of a few short months I am amazed. Especially with four small children and no help from anyone else! I may not have appreciated her efforts then, but I do now.
So Christmas is, in many ways, all about memories of Mom for me. Fortunately one of Mom's greatest gifts was the appreciation she gave me for family, and that's what will get me though the sad times coming up. She knew the secret to happiness, my mother. It was faith, family, and a sense that everything in life has a purpose. I'm hanging fast to those ideals because I want to be as content and at peace as she was when she left the world.
I miss you a whole lot Mom! But thanks so much for everything.
This is a melancholy time for me, as it is for so many other people. We miss our loved ones when they are gone, and yet life goes on and we need to be "in the moment" as well as in the past. It's a delicate balance. But I really miss my Mom - this is only my second Christmas since she died.
Mom loved Christmas. If not for her we wouldn't have had very happy holidays at my house because my father, for whatever reason, was not a big fan of all the fuss. I like to think it had something to do with some unhappy memories he had of his own past Christmases - either from his difficult childhood or the years he spent in the freezing cold on the front lines during WWII. But my brother would no doubt say it was just because Dad was tight with his money and watching it being spent so freely on things like gifts and decorations was not his idea of fun.
Whatever the reason, his negative energy was counteracted by Mom's unabashed love of all things Christmas. She decorated the house with taste and entertained with abandon. She wrapped gifts and hid them in the attic for weeks ahead of time, all with no real participation from Dad. When I think of the things she accomplished every Christmas in the course of a few short months I am amazed. Especially with four small children and no help from anyone else! I may not have appreciated her efforts then, but I do now.
So Christmas is, in many ways, all about memories of Mom for me. Fortunately one of Mom's greatest gifts was the appreciation she gave me for family, and that's what will get me though the sad times coming up. She knew the secret to happiness, my mother. It was faith, family, and a sense that everything in life has a purpose. I'm hanging fast to those ideals because I want to be as content and at peace as she was when she left the world.
I miss you a whole lot Mom! But thanks so much for everything.
No comments:
Post a Comment