Saturday, August 1, 2015

Last night

Last night we were invited to dinner at the Devon Yacht Club and it was magical.

I love Devon. I love the setting and I love the rustic charm of it, sitting right there on the bay. We were at a table on the end of the deck, tucked in between the dunes and the rest of the crowd. The company was wonderful and the food delicious. At a certain point in the evening a bell rang, everyone stood in place, and the flag was lowered to somber silence. Once safely down the announcement was "As you were", the conversation resumed and dinner continued.

The conversation was convivial and light and we laughed and shared stories...and suddenly, with the sky turning pink in the west across the water, all gleaming in the dusk, we looked to the east and there, peeking out between the dune grasses, was the most spectacular full moon I've seen in awhile. It was huge and bright and absolutely stunning. It was as though there was too much to take in as My eyes swept across the horizon from sunset to moon rise, back and forth between breaks in the conversation. It was a little piece of heaven for a short time, but a night that I'll remember for a long, long time.

Sometimes, just like last night, life gives us a gift of a special memory. And they are to be treasured.

Friday, July 31, 2015

Blue moon

Tonight there will be a "blue moon". That brings back memories to me!

When I was in the 6th grade I remember the class walking over from the elementary school on Church Street to the high school on Newtown Lane to see a band/chorus concert. It was the one they used to do for the school in the afternoon-like a dress rehearsal-before the evening one for parents. I guess the school population was small enough in those days that they could fit the 6th graders in the auditorium as well as the 7-12th students, and figured it was a good way to acclimate us to the school we'd be attending the following year.

In any case, I was a music nerd, so of course I was enamored with everything about the concert, but one thing totally transfixed me. There was this beautiful high school senior who had a gorgeous singing voice. In those days they really dressed for such events and she had on a lovely color-blocked gown with spaghetti straps, one of which kept falling off her shoulder, and she sang a solo that was in Italian. Wow-I was impressed! Then she stepped out again to sing with the jazz band and she did a song I'd never heard before titled "Blue Moon". You know the one-it was popular in the 5Os: "Blue moon, you caught me standing alone...". I imagined a moon the shade of blue, with no idea what the term really meant! Anyway, I was totally bowled over. The song, the voice, the singer (her name was Diane), all perfection to me and just what I aspired to. Some day I would sing with that jazz band, I told myself!

Well I did sing with the high school jazz band eventually, but wasn't as crazy about the song I had to do, and never looked anywhere as pretty or sounded nearly as good as Diane did back when I was in the 6th grade. It was a lot to live up to, that early memory! And when I hear mention of a blue moon, like the one we'll see tonight, it all comes back to me in vivid, technicolor memory. I'll be thinking of Diane tonight when I look up into the sky.

Thursday, July 30, 2015


Only two more days until my daughter and her kids leave to return to their home in Pennsylvania. Sigh....

Oh I know-I'm a lucky woman. They come every summer and spend six weeks here. It's wonderful. The problem is I get so used to having them here it is even harder to see them go. There's something so different about the experience of them being here for such a nice long stretch of time. There's far less stress-no need to squeeze everything into a few short days on a long weekend, our usual visits. We have time to do lots of fun things together.

But now, I've had a taste of life with them living here. And it's such a tease.

I love these long summer visits. And I hate them too. Well, not the visits...just the leavings....

Wednesday, July 29, 2015


I am so torn about air conditioning.

It has only been four years now that we've had any air conditioning in our home. We finally broke down and bought units for the bedroom windows, first for the guest rooms, then two years later for our own bedroom. It seems as though we really don't need it all that often, yet we become dependent on it pretty quickly. And in my old age I find myself becoming intolerant of heat and humidity. So gaining some good nighttime sleep has been a great blessing, for sure.

But now we are having discussions about putting air conditioning in the rest of the house. Those discussions revolve around something called a "split system" which I really don't quite understand yet. But it means the comfort of air conditioning in the entire house, which certainly has some appeal.

But there are downsides as well. Once the house is closed up, I have a feeling the a/c will be on most of the time, even when not really necessary. It's costly, and non-environmentally friendly, and besides, I like fresh air and natural breezes. But who wants to constantly be walking around opening and closing all the windows? mind is whirling with questions and trying to get a handle on what exactly the answers are. I wonder when I'll ever find them.

Tuesday, July 28, 2015


So apparently, following an absolutely beautiful few days of weather, the triple H weather is returning for another run. The heat, haze, and humidity are back starting today and most probably following into the weekend.

According to the weather experts, tomorrow will be the worst day, with temperatures heading toward 90, at least in the city.

This is my least favorite kind of weather and I'm not looking forward to it. I may have to escape to the movie theater again, or eat out a lot. I have to visit the hospital in the morning for a test, and it's always nice and cool there. The only reason I might look forward to climbing into that MRI machine....

Yes, there is always a silver lining to every cloud if we choose to look for it....

Monday, July 27, 2015

Wake up call

I've come to the conclusion that everyone should have a "wake-up" moment in their life after the age of fifty. Because my brush with death has changed me so much I want to share my new-found appreciation for life with everyone.

This past weekend, celebrating a wedding with family and friends once again reminded me of how lucky I am to have gone through cancer in my '50s. Because I approach, and then experience, each special event with such new appreciation and joy. I sit watching grandchildren on stage or on the playing field, or attend a wedding like Saturday's, and never stop thinking about how special life is, how amazing love, family, and friendship are, and how blessed I am to be here to appreciate it all that much more. I think of my cancer as a gift now, because it has given my life new meaning and great focus. Colors are brighter, beauty is more striking, and joys doubled for me.

Everyone should be so lucky....

Sunday, July 26, 2015

Winding down

So my daughter and her family have been here from Pennsylvania since the end of May. And this is the beginning of their last week with us. After all this time you would think I would simply be content to have had them with us for so long. So what is this funk I'm in?

I've come to understand that the problem is that these long summer visits get me very accustomed to having them around. I see them all the time, I get to enjoy long conversations and leisurely afternoons. There's no feeling of pressure to "get it all in" during a couple shirt days.

And, I fully realize what I'll be missing as soon as they leave. I know now how amazing it would be to have them live right here, within a minute's drive, so I could babysit, and attend school programs, and help with projects....

And YES, I know I am beyond blessed to have them here with us for such a nice, long stretch of time. But wow, I hate to see them leave.